Before I left town, I invited my mother to see me tell a story at the Moth Storytime at Warehouse Live in Houston. Then she signed up for a chance to tell a story.
“Son, wouldn’t it be funny if they put me up?
Yeah.. Ma, that’d be hilarious.”
And that’s exactly what happened.
“So we have court in March!”
And she killed.
Come and Take It Comedy Hang Over :
noun
The feeling of being too tired of having a great time on and off stage for an entire weekend.
Example: After hosting for the entire weekend at Warehouse Live Ashton Womack suffered a Come and Take It Comedy Hangover!
The Come And Take It Comedy Take Over was everything I expected and much more. They even wrote some nice things about my fellow Houston Comics and myself in the paper and the festival right over here.
Sunday was big, Sunday I meet Stan Lee!
To say the 12 year old me was as excited was the understatement of the decade! In my hands was a tattered and faded copy of an old Captain America comic I got at the Pearland flea market for a dollar. I slowly flip through the yellowed pages study the names on the page “Art by Jack Kirby” “Written by Stan Lee”. My mom calls me, I put the book in the plastic bag and board and we head out.
Five minutes later, my mom’s 1979 brown Volvo starts to spit smoke into the vehicle and breaks down in the middle of the road.
We avoid getting run over and push the car to the Food-A-Rama and wait by the pay phone.
While playing airplane games with my seat mates the conversation steers towards “So you’re a comic! Tell Me A Joke! Tell Me A Joke! ”. Part of me paused for a moment and reeled in disgust. “I’m sorry I know you get that a lot and hate it.”
Why the hell not I think to myself.
Sometimes you have to accept there are forces beyond your control, like arson.
If Cancer had a face, I’d punch it.
I would also give it a swift kick inbetween the legs. It had coming. No one would report me. I’d show them it was Cancer.
“Take these away from me!”, Reed hands me a pack of Menthols as he swears to me, “I got to quit smoking these!”.
The next night I run into another friend, “Hey Landis, you still smoke?”.
“Sure.”
I hand Landis the pack.
Shortly after a flustered Reed appears, “Does anyone have a cigarette?”.
Landis hands Reed a cigarette from the pack that was originally his.
For almost a year, I’ve been hosting movies at the Alamo Draft House in Houston. Yet most folks still have no idea what I do.
I don’t heckle the movie or make fun of them. It’s more like a Leonard Maltin spiel before the film .
I point out things to look out for. Did you know that’s a fake Mohawk in Taxi Driver? John Wayne could of been Dirty Harry.
I also give backstory to films. Why are there Space Jamaicans in “Buckaroo Banzai”?
Films I’ve hosted are, Citizen Kane, Old Boy, Dirty Harry, Blood Simple, Beetlejuice, Buckaroo Banzai, There Will Be Blood, Almost Famous, Brazil, Taxi Driver, Raging Bull and many more!
In the age of Netflix, BluRay, and VOD, It’s amazing how the big screen changes things. While you’re you have a beer a burger and unlimited popcorn.
Currently I’ll be hosting Rob Reiner’s Rockumentary classic “This Is Spinal Tap”
“As long as there’s, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll.”
July 7th
10:00pm
Alamo Drafthouse Vintage Park
114 Vintage Park
Houston, Tx 77070
For Tickets Click Here!
Other than that come on by, put down the phone and enjoy the movie!
You can also buy the This Is Spinal Tap Poster Here!
Years ago, my father was out of country for quite some time.
When he returned I gave him a big hug and proclaimed in Farsi, “Dooster Daraam!”. (I Love You!)
His response, “Your Shoes Are On The Carpet!”.
January, 2008 New York City, the Village Lantern’s open mic.
Weighed down with backpack and jet lag, I stagger into the Village Lantern open mic and sign up, sit down and wait my turn.
From upstairs you can hear a cover band version of ‘Hey Jealousy’ bleeding into the comedy basement.
The next comic walks up to the mic and begins to tell jokes. And he is just bombing.
Set up, punch and audience indifference. Set up, punch and still nothing. This guy is just eating it.
As the comic gets off stage, another comic is brought up on stage. As the new comic arrives and adjust the mic, the cover band upstairs finish their Gin Blossoms cover and begins to cover Journey’s ‘Don’t Stop Believing’.
One minute into the song the next comic’s act starts picking up momentum. Jokes are hitting their mark. People start laughing.
The song progresses and the song reaches the chorus of ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ the comic on stage is getting funnier. Laughter and hope begins to fill the basement of jaded pros and hopefuls.
Then the song ends.
You could hear the simultaneous applause from both floors as the comic exits stage left.